Just Don't Read This

I'm really sorry. In advance. This post will absolutely ruin the chances of you getting $4 Chinese food ever again. No more swinging by on your way home, no more calling for delivery. It just won't seem like an appealing option anymore. Whew. Glad I got that out of the way. I'm kind of pessimistic by nature so I like to get all the bad news out up front. No surprises later.

On to the good news. This recipe is not at all difficult. I'm pretty sure my 11 year old brother who doesn't even like food could make it if I trusted him with a knife. It also doesn't take long. More good news. So much good news right now it almost makes me suspicious. I may have issues.

Originally I found this on food.com, but I've made it so many times now that it's completely different. Most things I cook evolve over time. This is homemade fried rice. I feel so much better when I eat this than takeout. To clarify, I'm not one of those people who's worried about preservatives, MSG, blah blah blah. I don't try to go organic. I'm not like anti-those things but I just don't stress about I that much. In fact, I'm probably worry way too little about all those things. BUT I do like fresh ingredients. I like how they taste. I like cooking my food because then I know exactly what goes in it, and that it isn't terrible for me. And I like that I don't feel disgusting and greasy after eating this, which I normally do from take out.

Enough rambling from your favorite internet crazy, let's get to the food.

Ingredients
2 onions, chopped (they don't need to be super small)
Vegetable oil
2 eggs, lightly beaten
Sesame Oil (if this your first time using it-store in refrigerator afterwards)
Soy Sauce
2 carrots finely chopped
6 cups cold cooked rice (just cook it the night before or something)

Possible Add Ins:
3/4 cup frozen peas (GROSS NEVER-English peas are one of two foods I won't put in my mouth. Bananas are the other)
Green onions (highly recommend this one)
Canned chicken (I'll explain in a minute)

Method
You'll need two non stick skillets if you've got them. That's what I use anyway. First, stir fry onions and carrots over medium high heat until you get a brown color on the onions. I use vegetable oil for this step. It normally takes about 10 minutes.

While those are cooking, put 5 drops of sesame oil and 5 drops of soy in the bowl with the eggs. Lightly beat them, and then pour them in your second skillet with 1/2 tbsp of oil. Let the skillet get hot before you pour in the eggs. Then swirl the egg around in that skillet until it sets. Just don't mess with it. Wait until it starts puffing up, then flip it over with a spatula. It won't take long at all once you flip it. Once the other side is done, remove it from the skillet and chop it up into small pieces. Just hold onto them for a while.

Pre flip

Post flip

At this point, you can add the canned chicken if you want. It won't be gross. I promise. I know canned meat is weird sometimes, but this isn't. Douse it all with soy and let some flavor from the soy soak in the chicken while its all getting hot. Stir fry that for about 5 minutes. Then, add in your cold rice, green onions if you go that route, and any other add ins. Mix it well and stir fry for another 5 minutes or so. Add in eggs and 3 tbsps of soy sauce. Keep adding soy sauce until it tastes like you'd like. Remember you can always add more to individual plates.

Get ready to get your socks knocked off. One day I'll post the recipe for Yum Yum sauce like they serve at hibachi places, which I like on top of my rice. For now, just enjoy your triumph.

Sorry China Dragon.

What takeout do you wish you could make at home?